">My Big World Of Crap

Former Federal Court judge, Marcus Einfeld, went to a lot of trouble to get out of paying a $77 speeding ticket.

After the various lies about someone other than him driving the car when his car was photographed speeding, and at least a couple of court cases, he’s finally owned up and pleaded guilty to making false statements.  He will be sentenced early next year.

While his lies about his speeding offence have resulted in court cases, and police investigations, and plenty of money wasted, whats the betting that he gets a mere slap over the wrist for his troubles?  Wouldn’t surprise me if no conviction was recorded and he got off with a warning, or a small fine.  If a regular member of the public did this, I’d bet they’d be looking at jail time for perjury.

What possessed him to lie to avoid a $77 fine?  Should have just paid up – now he’s at least trashed his reputation, made of mockery of his good name and perhaps can look forward to some criminal sanctions when he goes back to court for sentencing.

A YOUNG man wrecked a Ferrari worth a quarter of a million dollars, but escaped serious injury, when he crashed into a pole in Adelaide today.  Dad will no doubt have mixed feelings about this:

• on the one hand, his Ferrari was completely trashed
• on the other, somehow the driver and passenger walked away from this crash.

I guess it tells us that the safety features in a $250k car are worth it.

A Sydney family went to the Coogee Bay Hotel recently, to watch the National Rugby League grand final.  They evidently had a few problems with seeing the game, and with their meals, and complained to hotel staff a number of times.  To compensate for their troubles they were given a complimentary bowl of gelato icecream.

However, then things went from bad to much much worse (I could say things really turned to shit). 

In the words of the mother of the family:

"Later, this huge bowl of ice-cream arrived at our table as a ’sorry for all the hassle’,"

"There were four scoops including vanilla, chocolate and hazelnut. At the bottom, there appeared to be chocolate. Greedily, I went for it ahead of the kids. Thank heavens I did. The stench, the taste … I spat the food into a napkin and immediately I was sick.

"There was no doubting what it was. The whole family became hysterical. My poor son screamed at one of their staff: ‘You made my mum eat poo."’

and also:

"The minute I put the spoon to my lips, the stench went through my nostrils. I retched and spat it into the napkin,"

"My friend thought I was over-reacting, but when she smelt it, she started screaming: ‘Oh my god, they’ve served us s—."’

The family told the staff what had happened and immediately went to the Waverley police station, where they were advised it was a Health Department matter.  They also had the substance tested  by the Federal Government’s National Measurement Institute – and those tests confirm that the matter served to them - "has an offensive odour and physical properties similar to human excreta … and to contain fragments of a variety of plant matter typical of excreta".

Of course when something bad happens to anyone these days, first thing we do is lawyer up – so the family has now employed law firm Slater&Gordon in a legal action against the management of the hotel who, he says, have demonstrated "arrogance and a complete lack of contrition" and, worse, accused the family of only being after money.

According to the family the hotel offered to pay them $5000, but would not admit any liability for the incident. 

In a letter to the family, hotel general manager Tony Williams said: "If the incident did happen, as claimed, then it may well have been an act of industrial sabotage — with the hotel as a victim alongside your family." But yesterday Mr Williams said the case was now a legal issue that would be "vigorously defended".

"We are aware of the allegation and are treating it as extremely suspicious. Mr and Mrs Whyte have made a demand for up to $1 million from The Coogee Bay Hotel … We categorically stand behind the high quality of our food and the exemplary hygiene standards set in the new brassiere kitchen."

(Note I’m curious what a “brassiere” kitchen is –one with only females doing the cooking?").

He also said:

"The couple making the suspicious allegation have made a demand for up to $1 million from The Coogee Bay Hotel, which we believe borders on extortion.”

Of course the family is denying that, saying:

"This isn’t about money. It’s about making sure it never happens again."

I’m not sure where I stand on this story.  On the one hand, while I’m sure it would be very distressing to be served up a plate of shit, a claim for $1m seems over the top.  Also, the fact that the turd in the icecream didn’t stink the place out before the woman noticed it as she put it in her mouth just doesn’t ring true – it would require considerable pre-planning on someone’s part to have a frozen turd on hand to spike someone’s food with.  On the other hand, the hotel is a dive and I wouldn’t put this sort of dodgy behaviour past it.  (It currently ranks second in the police list of the 100 most violent pubs in NSW …. surprising they didn’t try to have the bouncers sort the argument with the family out?)

Apart from over-exaggerate the supposed illness, that is.

Another is do not brag about it on your Facebook page.

Kyle Doyle, who works at telco, AAPT, did, and got busted by his boss.  He took a sick day after a big night out, and his boss refused to approve his sick leave.  Kyle disputed this, claiming that the leave was for medical reasons, and asking for proof from his manager why he didn’t consider the sick leave valid.  His manager sent him this:

Totally busted, Doyle replied to the boss:

 “HAHAHA LMAO [laughing my ass off] epic fail. No worries man.”

This one has to be right up there with the best.

A police car had stopped for fuel at a Batemans Bay service station in New South Wales late on Saturday when their car was nearly hit by a woman reversing her vehicle.  The police asked her to stop and get out of the car, but she drove off.

A short time later police responded to reports of a car in a ditch, which they allege the driver had set alight. The number plates had also been removed.  The woman tested positive for alcohol at the scene,  and got a reading of 0.155 in a breath analysis back at the police station.

The 25-year-old, from Broulee, was charged with high-range drink driving.

As the slogan goes “Drink, drive, bloody idiot”.  This lady is absolute proof of that.

Two petrol stations in western Sydney dropped their prices today to 94.9 cents per litre, down from the regular price of $1.46.   The move caused hour-long traffic queues, with angry drivers shouting and sounding horns as their frustration mounted.  They got more angry as the stations put their price up to 139.9 a few hours later.

Police were trying to control traffic flow but said it was close to gridlock.

Carl Partridge, 21, was given leave by his boss to go and fill up quickly while the price was still below $1. But 2½ hours later he was still in the queue and the price had gone up 40 cents a litre.

"I’m pretty pissed off,"

he said.

 "They shouldn’t be allowed to do it. They put it down to 99 cents. They should do it for the rest of the day, not just for whenever they feel like it … it’s unfair."

He said he had seen at least six verbal fights in the queue. "It’s not a pretty sight," he said.

Navneet Kaur, also 21, lined up for more than an hour. She joined the queue when prices were 94 cents, but as she neared the front they had reached more than $1.39. She saved about $6 on a tank that would usually have cost her $70.

"I was so angry, it was ridiculous … it wasn’t worth the wait."

I suppose I shouldn’t be so amazed at how crazy people get over the chance to save a few dollars (I don’t understand the post Christmas sales either – I couldn’t think of much worse than queuing outside a store for hours to fight through a crowd to maybe find something I wanted at a decent discount).

When I think about it 50 cents a litre in my car works out a bit under $30 for a full tank.  Would I queue for an hour to save $30?  Not likely, I value my time way more than that.  Not to mention that many of those trying to buy would have driven some way to get in the queue, spent time idling and using petrol so they’ve probably saved themselves somewhat less than $30.  While saving money on petrol is always nice, I don’t think I’d go out of my way to do it, and I certainly wouldn’t have gotten in the queue if it was more than a few cars long.

As for the people who got into fights over it …. get a grip!

I’ve been a bit scarce here lately,  Holidays a couple of weeks ago, then a week travelling for work to Sydney and Melbourne.

One thing I did do outside of work in Sydney was go to see The New Pornographers at the Annandale Hotel.  Enjoyed it very much, even without Neko Case being with them.  From “My Rights vs Yours” through to “My Slow Descent into Alcoholism” there wasn’t one dud song – the only bummer in it was that I’ve now seen The New Pornographers twice and have yet to get “Letter from an Occupant”.  Oh well, maybe next time.

I also quite liked An Horse – the support band.

Its the Bathurst 1000 car racing meeting this weekend.  Basically thats a giant boganfest where thousands of yobbos get together to get pissed, fight and watch the Ford vs Holden car racing.

A couple of guys got kicked out yesterday:

• A 22-year-old Moss Vale man was arrested shortly after 10pm (AEDT) yesterday after launching himself at a male police officer sitting inside a police car, hitting him on the head with a dildo
• a 35-year-old St Helens Park man was arrested after police found him wheeling around a television set showing porn.

Thats what bogans do when they get together for a bit of fun.

I suppose some of them need a bit of distraction, seeing organisers have applied alcohol limits this year.  Some of the yobs would be doing it tough, having a dry weekend because they can only bring in a limited amount of booze.

Each adult race enthusiast who is camping can bring BYO alcohol into the campgrounds only provided they only bring one of the following items into the campgrounds each day:

• One case (24 cans) of full-strength beer; OR
• One block (36 cans of light or mid-strength beer (3.5% alcohol content or less); OR
• One case (up to 24 cans) of pre-mixed drinks (6% alcohol content or less); OR
• One cask of wine (up to four litres).

A combination of these items is not allowed.

Whats the country coming to?  A slab a day – a man could die of thirst up there at Mt Panorama!

Ben Lyons worked in the Australian Public Service in Canberra.  He had some problems at work and felt like taking a few sickies.  Nothing especially unusual about that.  But Ben took it further, and forged doctors’ certificates to cover his sick leave.

But then he really overdid it, taking time off work and telling his department he had lung cancer, and needed time off for surgery.  His manager, obviously a caring and sharing one, was concerned for her colleague’s welfare, and went to visit him in Canberra Hospital in September after being told that Lyons was having surgery for lung cancer, a claim supported by a fake letter from the head of the hospital’s oncology unit.  When she could not find her colleague at Canberra Hospital, she thought she might be at the wrong place and tried Calvary, Calvary John James and the National Capital Private hospitals but was told none of them had any record of Lyons as a patient.

Lyons told the court through his lawyer Michael Toole that he regretted the episode and that after he was sacked by the department for the fraud, his partner and two children had left him because they ”didn’t want to be associated with him any more”.  Mr Toole said the offending by Lyons, now 28, was born of desperation to avoid contact with his supervisor at the department with whom he had a poor relationship and this had ”caused some issues and some stress”.

The court ordered Lyons to refund more than $3000 in sickness benefits he was paid by the department and he was convicted of three counts of falsely obtaining financial advantage by supplying forged doctors’ certificates.  He was also given a 2 year good behaviour bond and fined $900.

Damn expensive sickie – job, family, reputation and credibility all screwed, not to mention the refund to the department and fine he has to pay.  I suppose thats what you get when you are too stupid to know when credibility is being stretched just a tad too far.

Got home from Tasmania last night.  Had a nice few days veging out and doing a few fun things with my son while my wife spent her time catching up with friends and relatives.

The best thing we did was the Hollybank Treetops Adventure – it was awesome, flying through the trees on flying foxes (ziplines).  My daughter recommended it from her trip to visit her grandmother a couple of months ago, so we decided to try it ourselves this time.